Random confessions

Happy memories...

2010-08-22T09:05:00.001+08:00

A Roller Coaster Love

2010-08-22T08:30:00.003+08:00

It has been a month now and a lot of crazy things have happened...

From the read this book for inspiration... Friday the 13th reminds me of something... funny thoughts about the blog... Nothing I just remembered you... Chatting with the wasted... Next day I'm still drunk...

I was UP then I was DOWN.... Happy at some point then back to being Sad...
Confused? Yes.
Anxious? Maybe
In Love? I really don't know!

Whooooo! This is really a one crazy roller coaster ride!

Wanting for more? Or wishing it would stop?

It's Complicated

2010-08-03T21:22:00.007+08:00

After the unexpected, he came back to me asking for another chance, we can start over again and just enjoy life... :)

But unfortunately, after 2 months, it happened again, or should I say it was worst and close to a really bad ending... :(

In a relationship but It's Complicated... whenever I see this status, I'm really clueless, what the hell? why mention such thing? It was just recently I get to understand the real meaning of It's Complicated... :(

It was just a small fight that led to another unexpected event... a break-up?

He started telling me unwanted thoughts...things you're not supposed to tell unless you wanted a break-up... He said I'm better off with someone romantic... someone my opposite... things that I can't understand or won't like to understand or can't accept to hear coming from him... :( He added that he really has problem in making commitments and he really sucks as a boyfriend... :(

That night, I cried and told myself, he was trying to push me away, he doesn't care anymore, he doesn't love me anymore... :( Then, I decided to move away, not text him, no effort from me...and he did the same! :(

It was really hard for me... cried so many tears... I had so many thoughts and realizations about our relationship, about him, and about me... I decided to move forward and just leave our relationship just like that...if that's what he wanted then be it...

After 2 weeks, I got a text from him - hi, musta? I replied and a small catching up happened...He came back as if nothing happened between us... I acted the same thing...but the next day, I texted him that I didn't like what happened, I was trying to move on and he came back, it's so hard and I can't really be a friend to him... :(

No reply from him, I guess he wanted the same thing... :(

The Unexpected

2010-05-23T07:46:00.006+08:00

It was a fight coming; I didn't realize it can be a huge one!

Real huge that he said that I was really a big stress for him and that our relationship is "nakakatamad" na...

I felt I was slapped so hard that it made me cry... I broke down to tears!

I really can't help it; I was hurt with those words! I never thought he felt this way all the time being with me... I know I have been a good girlfriend, always there, sweet, loving, and just being me in love with him...

He wanted and requested for some space...

I really didn't want it, but this is what he wanted and so it goes...

It has been 3 days now of no communication...

Me wondering... Me thinking... Me confused... What the hell is happening with US? :(

20 months...

2010-01-20T22:57:00.003+08:00

No blog from me today, this is a special post written by one of my closest friend, B...she wrote this for nothing, she just felt writing something sweet about their love story... :)

------------------------------------

What are you eating, he asked. ReBel bar, I replied. Funny that it started with that simple error from me that had followed a lot more unacceptable mispronounced words- still, he had managed to correct me and smile at me back.

It's been 20 months of thousands of fights, window shopping for shoes together, pigging out, fighting on who'll decide where to go, what to watch and what to eat, sleeping, and secretly looking at each other's phones.

I realized the other day after my dinner with R on why I love him, It's not entirely on what we share in common but most on the differences we have. I often care on what people might feel and say about the things that I do. He doesn't care hearing negative things from people. I love chick flicks. He prefers to avoid them. I'm addicted to pictures. He couldn't care less. I hate coke, especially those bought in Mcdo. He loves coke, talking about McDonald's coke. I love cheesy stuff. He can't stand them.I love going to the mall and watch people as they run on sale. He prefers to stay home and watch dvd and more. Don't we just hate ourselves for being the worst couple? No- we're still in tact, very much in love.

I love it. That we can openly be honest with each other. That we already have these games that we play together when we're alone. That every after fight, there are realizations and forgiveness. I love the fact that I knew it would always be him. It just has to be. No one gets me better but him.

I know what we have is different. And that's what makes it great.

2 breads made my day

2010-01-19T22:15:00.002+08:00

Woke up this morning so lazy to go to work, but of course, I had to... and so my day didn't really started right and was just not in the mood for anything!

Suddenly craving for BreadTalk, I sweetly asked my boyfriend, D to buy me some bread on his way to office that afternoon... he said okay and texted that he just got me 1 bread cause I can't really finish 2 breads, which was my original request... of course, my initial reaction was what? why just one? I also wanted the floss bread dear...hmmmm... guess can't really do anything about it...

But when I met him to get my bread, I was surprised and there were 2... ;) and I secretly smiled and felt his sweetness... awwwww...

These 2 breads made me forget my bad mood day and I really love him for that... :)

Thanks D! :)

Single but in a relationship

2010-01-19T21:59:00.002+08:00

I started this blog last May 2009 with the idea of having a blog that would talk about anything about my singleness... that I wasn't sure until when will that be... but after 6 months, it just happened... I met someone, fell in love, happy and just loved everything about him.

Yes, I'm still single (not yet married), in a relationship, and a serious one... :)Praying and hoping for the best in US. :)

Talk about failures...

2010-01-18T22:24:00.003+08:00

First confession - I failed to write daily in this blog, I can't really do it... been too busy with nothing... :(

Second confession - I feel totally lost with my current career right now. I know I need to move on to a new and different level but I'm uncertain on how to take that big step to go further... :(

Third confession - I have this feeling that I'm afraid to show. I think I'm scared. I really don't know... :(

I really hate these all! I need to overcome them, I will really try so help me God...

Saying Hello 2010!

2010-01-03T13:09:00.005+08:00

It's now the 3rd day of the New Year and I have decided to bring this blog back to life after shutting it down for almost 5 months...due to some petty blog and people issues... and I'm totally over now and having a new year, new me, past is past, so whatever I have written in my previous posts then let's just leave it there, okay?

It's a new year, new me... or should I say making me better, making the most out of me this year, the best that I can be in 2010... this blog will now be my online journal of my day to day events, insights, adventures that I would want to share... for inspiration or just simply letting out what I feel... so if my stories interests you then feel free to follow and read me... ; )

I will try to write daily, I really want to and I really hope I can do it... :)

A lot have happened in 2009, a lot have changed and I think I have a lot to reveal for my following posts... so just hang on... :)

Women and Courtship

2009-08-10T20:29:00.005+08:00

At present even if traditional courtship is becoming obsolete, women should not be the first person to show their feelings to men. If women are accepted to court men in society, I guess there will be no single lady left. All will be free to choose and openly show their feelings to men they want.

Relationship misunderstandings and other lovers’ quarrels will then be limited. Women can now show their true affections and men will be completely aware and knowledgeable of everything in their relationship. More loving and sweetness between lovers will also be evident because I believe that women are real sweeter than men.

If these are all true, I guess I could have chosen the right man for me… :)

Boyfriend requirements

2009-07-30T21:22:00.006+08:00

Here's a list of qualities that I look/want for a guy, a must or just hoping to have these qualities present... :)

Good-looking.
Cute.
Charming.
He should be sweet.
A gentleman.
Thoughtful.
Knows how to cook.
Responsible in all his actions.
Loves to travel.
Loves to eat.
Good conversationalist.
Has a decent job.
Has his own car and home.
Shares same interests.
Achiever.
God-fearing.
Sociable.
Patient and understanding.

Number 2

2009-07-12T20:43:00.003+08:00

It is hard to be in a situation wherein there's another woman in his life
You know they are together but not sure if they are happy?
He comes to you as if he is not attached
He shows concern, effort and sweetness
He makes you smile and happy
But you know you should not be serious about him
And this happiness is just for awhile
He will again leave you for this other woman
You are not sure if you are doing the right thing
You just go with the flow
But not aware where it will go

I H-A-T-E you

2009-07-11T21:08:00.003+08:00

I can't really control my feelings and now I'm blogging about it... I really hate men who are insensitive and selfish.

You should not have said that, you should have thought of what we have been through, what I have been through with you... I know I gave all my best during our time, I became the most caring and loving girlfriend... that you never appreciated at all... that I know I don't deserved that treatment and I don't deserve someone like you...

I think this would be our last, my last for you...

Zero Credit

2009-07-05T23:27:00.003+08:00

This morning, I was shocked when I saw my credit card details online, available limit is ZERO. OMG! Is this for real? I felt robbed, I felt so poor... funny ah? Robbed with money that I don't have..haha. What the hell is happening? I felt blank because I don't know how would I manage to pay for all my debts. Waaaaaaaahhhhhhh... So starting tomorrow, I'll be saving my money and stop splurging. I just hope I can do this... so help me God. :)

My Crushie

2009-07-05T22:48:00.004+08:00

I don't really like him but I just find him cute and very pleasant to look at. He looks clean and neat. It never came into my mind that I would see him in person. Just this evening, I saw him at a resto and having his 2 fresh buko juice in front of him. :) I had my cam with me but I didn't have the courage to talk to him and have a picture. I was so shy that I was just smiling so hard and laughing at myself because I can't control the excitement and happiness that I was feeling. :P

A bit disappointing experience but I'm just hoping we can again meet in the future. We never know, maybe we are destined. Haha, just kidding. :P Well, I'm just happy that I saw him in person. :)

Hunihan - Pinoy Twitter

2009-06-17T22:07:00.005+08:00

Twitter has dominated the online world. You became addicted in tweeting, tweet your breakfast, tweet your trip, tweet your frustrations, tweet sweetness and a lot of tweeting that made you go gaga over twitter.

Now, Pinoys have come up to make tweeting in Pinoy style... Hunihan is now the Pinoy Twitter. Tweet now, join now and conquer the Pinoy world.

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Maghunihan na tayo at abutin ang bawat Pinoy sa mundo. www.hunihan.com

Exhibit D - Mr. Serendipity

2009-06-17T21:39:00.003+08:00

You were busy waiting for your man and starting to get frustrated, where the hell is he??? Then while you were rushing to catch the train, you picked up someone else's wallet, and realized that the owner is good-looking, think he's hot and one way to know him is to return his lost wallet!!! :) You then started to look for his number, just any number in his wallet that can lead you to him... You were successful! :) You will see him tomorrow... A bit nervous, you just go with the flow... He invited you for lunch to repay you of your good work... Talked about each other's lives, likes, and other stuffs... Happy, enjoyed the time with him and gone crazy in meeting Mr. Serendipity... :)

Exhibit C - The Chat mate

2009-06-15T16:24:00.003+08:00

Nowadays, it is OK to meet someone online...you hooked up in a social media site, exchanged emails and IMs...

Days and nights were spent chatting online... you learned a lot from each other without really seeing and being with that person...

One day, the whole chatting online just stopped... you'll ask but can't do anything about it cause you just met online and that's it!

After some time, he would suddenly pop and there it goes again... Then again, he disappears!

Can we say chatting is like a booty call? Chat mate is there when he needs you for something... not for sex but definitely for something else...

"Me" day at the Spa

2009-06-13T20:11:00.003+08:00

Hair Protein Treatment, "Coffee" thingy Body Scrub and Anti-stress thermal massage, all for me please... :)

Finally, got a time to spend my money for myself and to splurge in one day!

Happy, felt relaxed, enjoyed and will definitely do it again... :)

Exhibit B - The LDR Guy

2009-06-11T11:09:00.015+08:00

You became a couple, then suddenly he needs to go..love still remains despite the distance...committed but not together...communication is the only key in the relationship..But if the only key was not present, where would the relationship go? Call me stupid, yes it is really stupid to get into this kind of relationship...hoping it will end but reality it won't...you will always be waiting...uncertain about the future...you just have to let go...

My date

2009-06-07T12:17:00.004+08:00

One evening, I just decided to have a date with.... Myself! :) Got a time to think and see myself more clearly... there are just some issues I need to face and I guess I now made a choice... :)

Thanks for the hot caramel macchiato, cranberry loaf and a time with Fred... :)

Boka-bularyong Pamatay

2009-05-28T11:21:00.013+08:00

Ang mga makikitang salita ay hango sa aming mga nakalap mula sa isang tanyag na tao sa aming industriya. Ninais kong gawing tagalog ang blog na ito dahil walang katulad at mas matitindi ang mga salita na ginamitan ng wikang Filipino. Wala naman akong nais tamaan dito, marami lang ang nakakarinig, nakakaalam at nasisiyahan tuwing maririnig o mababasa ang mga pamatay na salitang ito ngunit di lahat ay nakakaalam ng ibig sabhin kaya sana ito'y magbigay linaw sa mga bagay bagay...

1. "Post-mortem" Focused Group Discussion (FGD)

Ayon sa aming source
This is the term used to refer to the meeting held after an issue has been printed and sold in a magazine industry.

Para sa akin
Ito ang ginagawang pagsusuri sa mga bangkay. Bangkay ba kami at naisipan mo sa amin gamitin ang Post-mortem mo?

2. Hairsplitter-precise

Sentence construction (na lang dahil di nga namin alam ang tunay na kahulugan!)
If we’re to be hairsplitter-precise about it...

Para sa akin
Hmmmm... hindi kita maintindihan lalo na at wala naman akong split-hairs...

3. "Hot off the press" feel

Sentence construction (na lang dahil di nga namin alam ang tunay na kahulugan!)
but I want it to have that “hot off the press” feel…

Para sa akin
Wala talagang tatalo sa mainit at kumukulo pang balita na galing sa Press? Sana madama mo na din ang init ng ulo ng mga tao...

4. Meneger or Manager

Ano ba eto? Epol for Apple? Meneger ba ay tawag sa isang tao na nasa mataas na posisyon? Ikaw ba to?

5. Benner

Isa pang Epol for Apple. So san mo nga ulet gusto ilagay ang benner? Sa taas, sa tuktok, oo nga sa pinaka tuktok para kitang kita agad ang benner, at bubungad sa mga bisita.

6. Prominent Violator

Anu? May kasalanan ba ako at isa akong violator? O eto ba ay isang pasaway na lumalabag sa batas? At kailangan maging sikat ka? Ganun? Ikaw na ang sikat.

7. Beef up

Sentence construction
Is there any way we can beef this up? It’s kind of boring.

Para sa akin
Bakit nga beef lang? Di ba pwede ang pork o pish? O kaya veggie... di ba mas sosyalin ang dating at mag-inarteng vegetarian...

8. Copy 1, Copy 2, Copy 3

Do you copy me? Hehe Copy, copy, copy, talagang mahilig ka dito noh? Dagdagan mo na din ng Paste, paste, paste.

9. Hollerback

Ikaw ba si Holla Back Girl? Pwede nga, babagay nga sau yan, sige pagbutihin mo lang at holla, holla ka lang ah...

Paalala:
Ang lahat ng ito ay katuwaan lamang, bahala ka na kung maiintindihan mo o hinde, kung may maidagdag ka pa, sige lang, at siguradong dadami pa ang boka-bularyong pamatay, sana ito din ay maging dagdag kaalaman, kung gusto mong tularan at gamitin ang mga salitang ito, walang pipigil sau... :)

Call of a Wedding

2009-05-15T23:21:00.000+08:00

Would be my scariest nightmare...I think if ever this will happen to me, I would go crazy... it won't just be an embarrassment but deep disappointment in life... :(

I just got a news from a friend that his supposed to be wife had postponed their wedding without informing him first and gave a very, very lame reason, I think.... will you accept a reason that a sibling caused some trouble and family needs to settle the problem and cancel your BIG day...?

If ever you would cancel your wedding or you suddenly didn't want to get married, it would be best to just say it straight and not come up with lame excuses just to cancel it! It will be hard to accept it but we all have to be honest with our feelings and avoid hurting more the other person.

I really felt sad hearing this story... :(

Lenka - The Show Lyrics

2009-05-14T09:36:00.001+08:00

While in the car this morning, this song somehow inspired me... :) searched it right away and posted it... in bold are the words that I can relate to... :)

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I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
I don't know where to go I can't do it alone I've tried
And I don't know why

Slow it down
Make it stop
Or else my heart is going to pop
'Cause it's too much
Yeah, it's a lot
To be something I'm not

I'm a fool
Out of love
'Cause I just can't get enough

I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
I don't know where to go I can't do it alone I've tried
And I don't know why

I'm just a little girl lost in the moment
I'm so scared but I don't show it
I can't figure it out
It's bringing me down I know
I've got to let it go
And just enjoy the show

The sun is hot
In the sky
Just like a giant spotlight
The people follow the sign
And synchronize in time
It's a joke
Nobody knows
They've got a ticket to that show
Yeah

I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
I dont know where to go I can't do it alone I've tried
And I don't know why

I'm just a little girl lost in the moment
I'm so scared but I don't show it
I can't figure it out
It's bringing me down I know
I've got to let it go
And just enjoy the show

Just enjoy the show

I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
I dont know where to go I can't do it alone I've tried
And I don't know why

I'm just a little girl lost in the moment
I'm so scared but I don't show it
I can't figure it out
It's bringing me down I know
I've got to let it go
And just enjoy the show

dum de dum
dudum de dum

Just enjoy the show

dum de dum
dudum de dum

Just enjoy the show

I want my money back
I want my money back
I want my money back
Just enjoy the show

I want my money back
I want my money back
I want my money back
Just enjoy the show

Top 10 reasons being Single is Sexy

2009-05-13T13:10:00.007+08:00

1. You only love yourself.
2. You enjoy every minute alone.
3. You can do anything you want and think what you want.
4. You don't have to worry about anything or anyone.
5. You have all your time for yourself.
6. You can meet and hang out with anyone.
7. You can go out with your other girl and boy friends without curfews and/or restrictions.
8. You can date different men.
9. You become independent and responsible.
10. You will learn significant realizations about life.